anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
