the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
