i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
