This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize