Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
