there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I am available for nakedness
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
