Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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