he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
