Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
