Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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