My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
