This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
