bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
