No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
