Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
