Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Who died my cat blue again?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
