The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
