things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
