She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I've blown a few things in my day
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
