She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize