I smell stomach acid.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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