I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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