i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
