Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize