So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
