And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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