Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
This house was built for laser tag.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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