Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize