well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
