Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
you never un-have a 4some
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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