why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize
