He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
