You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
