I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i barfeds in our rink
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize