Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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