ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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