The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
