how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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