Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
