we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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