I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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