You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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