i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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