Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
