nut hugger
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
