yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Just pee around me
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
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