she woke up with a sticky ear
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
