I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize