Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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