Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Dicks are not precious.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
