What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
